-
Living with Dying: Thoughts on friendship and cancer
I get by with a little help from my friends
-
Caring for the Skin You’re In: Cancer, Cellulitis and The Lymphedema Treatment Act
Right now, I’m sitting in the heat, with this hot computer on my lap, and every fan in the house aimed at me while I try to type with just my left hand. My right hand is out of commission and elevated on a pile of pillows. This scenario is not conducive to getting much writing done – or to adequately being there for the 6-year-old. On days like this, I’m the yell-at-the-kid-from-the-couch mom, rather than the walk-across-the-room-and-address-the-situation-appropriately mom. The heat doesn’t help with that either. Nor does the pain. What’s going on with my arm? It’s recovering from my second bout of cellulitis this summer. Cellulitis is a skin infection…
- Cancer, Creating a Living, Featured, How to Juggle Cancer and Parenting, Living Well, Parenting, Seattle
A Note to Mom | Listen to Your Mother
The day before Mother’s Day, thirteen Seattle area writers came together to share their thoughts and observations on motherhood at Seattle’s inaugural production of the Listen to Your Mother show. I was one of those writers. Today, videos of each segment of the show were released. I appeared first, so my clip is up first, but you can keep watching to see the whole show. What an amazing experience. I’m so honored to be included with this amazing group of writers.
-
When cancer complicates body image and parenting
Body image is a critical issue when raising young girls. When mom's body image is complicated by cancer, things get interesting.
-
Lisa Bonchek Adams
It has been almost exactly 5 years since my world was turned upside down with the words “It’s cancer.” In those years, there have been many things that sustained me: my family, my friends. I know I’ve written extensively about how my girls in YSC have held me up and helped me keep it together. But another thing that helped me through this hell-ride of cancer survivorship is the voices of other bloggers with cancer. Through the magic of the interwebs, we were able to find each other, encourage each other, and be there for each other. These voices, I could recognize from just a couple sentences of their writing,…
-
How to deal with disappointment
I know that one of my jobs as a parent is to teach her how to deal with disappointment – but not like this; this isn’t what I had in mind. We should be working on learning how to gracefully accept that she gets what she gets for dinner, and not necessarily a doughnut. We should be working on accepting the fact that she’s not getting a pony for her birthday. We should be working on understanding that all fun activities end eventually, and when the playdate is over, we need to gracefully go home. Instead, we had to cancel our vacation last minute because I came down with influenza. She…
-
Comparing Pain
She wanted to talk to me about cancer, but she hesitated. She was worried because she thought her cancer wasn’t as bad as mine. When I finally realized the reason for the hesitation, for the trepidation in her voice, my heart dropped. She had just apologized because she thought her cancer wasn’t bad enough. No one should ever have to do that. It hurts to think I might have given that impression, but I know it’s not just me. This issue of comparison is part of our culture. We compare cars, houses, job titles, the behavior of our kids, and even our pain. Comparing pain is insidious. We are measured against others throughout…
-
Vera Beautified Me for Get Hitched Give Hope
I was getting ready for Get Hitched Give Hope, an amazing, annual charity event that pairs wedding planners and vendors with happy couples planning their nuptials, and the proceeds benefit two organizations that support people living with cancer: the Young Survival Coalition and the Dream Foundation. It was my biggest formal event of the season, and the driving Seattle rain had just gone horizontal. I was so glad I arranged with Vera to have stylists come to my home to do my hair and makeup. I could get beautified at home in my pajamas, and not have to brave the weather until I left for the party. My hair likes to frizz and…
-
YSC, the Tour de Pink, and #GivingTuesday
A couple months ago, after a Tour de Pink training ride, my friend and fellow cancer survivor, Karen Lawson, posted a selfie on Facebook, and wrote, “Love these legs and the 57 HILLY miles they just carried me up.” I was surprised when my eyes welled up at reading her post. In the nearly 5 years since my breast cancer diagnosis, one of the things I’m still working on is forgiving my body, and learning to develop compassion and even appreciation for my body – mutant genes and all. Cancer felt like a betrayal; my own body turned against me. I’ve learned that I am not alone in feeling this…
-
How to Juggle Cancer and Parenting Series: Stephanie’s Story
Just because you look ok on the outside- it doesn’t mean you are ok on the inside. Cancer is not like strep. You are not better in 5 days. It can take awhile (even years) until you are ok.
