{"id":8206,"date":"2015-02-17T11:39:37","date_gmt":"2015-02-17T18:39:37","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/?p=8206"},"modified":"2021-03-18T22:10:14","modified_gmt":"2021-03-19T05:10:14","slug":"deal-with-disappointment","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2015\/02\/17\/deal-with-disappointment\/","title":{"rendered":"Teaching Your Kids to Deal with Disappointment"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

I know that one of my jobs as a parent is to teach her how to deal with disappointment – but not like this; this isn’t what I had in mind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We should be working on learning how to gracefully accept that she gets what she gets for dinner, and not necessarily a doughnut.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"165\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

We should be working on accepting the fact that she’s not getting a pony for her birthday.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We should be working on understanding that all fun activities end eventually, and when the playdate is over, we need to gracefully go home.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Instead, we had to cancel our vacation last minute because I came down with influenza. She was so excited about our trip to Alaska<\/a>, but I was far too sick to take her anywhere.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I sat down in her kid-sized green and white polka-dot easy chair and pulled her into my lap. “I have some bad news,” I said, “we can’t go to Alaska tomorrow because Mommy is sick.”<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“No, no, no, no, no,” she repeated several times, and then she stopped. “It’s okay, Mommy. I know sometimes we can’t do things when you get sick.” She rested her head on my shoulder a bit, then ran out to the living room to play as if nothing had happened.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

That hurt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It hurts the way she has normalized my illnesses, Mommy being sick is just part of her life. Stupid cancer keeps messing with me, even when it’s not cancer.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But as much as it hurts, I’m proud of her, too.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Meanwhile, she still wants a doughnut.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And this time, she got one.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n
\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I know that one of my jobs as a parent is to teach her how to deal with disappointment – but not like this; this isn’t what I had in mind. We should be working on learning how to gracefully accept that she gets what she gets for dinner, and not necessarily a doughnut. We […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":9937,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[1063,1049,834,138,1053,1058],"tags":[1050,1051,351,1052,348],"class_list":["post-8206","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cancer-and-mental-health","category-emotional-skills","category-how-to-juggle-cancer-and-parenting","category-parenting-living-well","category-parenting-with-cancer","category-kids-emotional-needs","tag-adaptability","tag-emotional-skills","tag-life-is-what-happens-when-youre-making-other-plans","tag-life-skills","tag-parenting-with-cancer","et-has-post-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?fit=1600%2C900","blog_post_layout_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=150%2C150",150,150,true],"full":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?fit=1600%2C900",1600,900,false]},"categories_names":{"1063":{"name":"Cancer & Mental Health","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-with-cancer\/cancer-and-mental-health\/"},"1049":{"name":"Emotional Skills","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/life-skills\/emotional-skills\/"},"834":{"name":"How to Juggle Cancer and Parenting","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-with-cancer\/how-to-juggle-cancer-and-parenting\/"},"138":{"name":"Parenting & Family","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-living-well\/"},"1053":{"name":"Parenting with Cancer","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-with-cancer\/"},"1058":{"name":"Your Kids' Emotional Needs","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-with-cancer\/kids-emotional-needs\/"}},"tags_names":{"1050":{"name":"adaptability","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/adaptability\/"},"1051":{"name":"emotional skills","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/emotional-skills\/"},"351":{"name":"life is what happens when you're making other plans","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/life-is-what-happens-when-youre-making-other-plans\/"},"1052":{"name":"life skills","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/life-skills\/"},"348":{"name":"parenting with cancer","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/parenting-with-cancer\/"}},"comments_number":0,"wpmagazine_modules_lite_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=150%2C150",150,150,true],"cvmm-medium":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=300%2C300",300,300,true],"cvmm-medium-plus":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=305%2C207",305,207,true],"cvmm-portrait":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=400%2C600",400,600,true],"cvmm-medium-square":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=600%2C600",600,600,true],"cvmm-large":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=1024%2C900",1024,900,true],"cvmm-small":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?resize=130%2C95",130,95,true],"full":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2015\/02\/disappointment-1.png?fit=1600%2C900",1600,900,false]},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1fDeG-28m","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":4070,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2013\/01\/15\/just-breathe\/","url_meta":{"origin":8206,"position":0},"title":"Just Breathe","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"Sometimes all we have left is our breath. 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