{"id":3023,"date":"2011-07-18T09:47:06","date_gmt":"2011-07-18T16:47:06","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/?p=3023"},"modified":"2021-03-17T19:44:25","modified_gmt":"2021-03-18T02:44:25","slug":"the-world-according-to-a-toddler","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2011\/07\/18\/the-world-according-to-a-toddler\/","title":{"rendered":"The world according to a toddler"},"content":{"rendered":"

1. If I see it, it’s mine<\/p>\n

2. If I think about it, it’s mine<\/p>\n

3. If I like the show I want to watch it 30 times. In a row.<\/p>\n

4. If you suggest it, I don’t want it. Until I forget you suggested it, and think it’s my idea.<\/p>\n

5. Stolen food tastes better<\/p>\n

6. That baby in the mirror is pretty awesome<\/p>\n

7. Mommy and Daddy are all-powerful<\/p>\n

8. I can wrap Mommy and Daddy around my little finger<\/p>\n

9. If that fails, there’s Grandma<\/p>\n

10. Everything is amazing<\/p>\n

\"041\"<\/a>\"\"<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

1. If I see it, it’s mine 2. If I think about it, it’s mine 3. If I like the show I want to watch it 30 times. In a row. 4. If you suggest it, I don’t want it. Until I forget you suggested it, and think it’s my idea. 5. Stolen food tastes […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_seo_schema_type":"","_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_feature_clip_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2},"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false},"categories":[138],"tags":[272],"class_list":["post-3023","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting-living-well","tag-gem","et-doesnt-have-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","blog_post_layout_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":"","full":""},"categories_names":{"138":{"name":"Parenting & Family","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-living-well\/"}},"tags_names":{"272":{"name":"gem","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/gem\/"}},"comments_number":0,"wpmagazine_modules_lite_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":"","cvmm-medium":"","cvmm-medium-plus":"","cvmm-portrait":"","cvmm-medium-square":"","cvmm-large":"","cvmm-small":"","full":""},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1fDeG-ML","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":7982,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2014\/12\/31\/gems-gems-2014-wrapup\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":0},"title":"Gem’s Gems 2014 Wrapup","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"My kid says some funny stuff, and every year I post a round-up of some of her best lines. enjoy. \u00a0Ambition G: I can be anything I want when I grow up? Me: Sure, what do you want to be? G: A unicorn Me: wanna watch a movie? G: No.\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Parenting & Family"","block_context":{"text":"Parenting & Family","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-living-well\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/gems-gems.png?fit=640%2C640&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/gems-gems.png?fit=640%2C640&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2014\/12\/gems-gems.png?fit=640%2C640&resize=525%2C300 1.5x"},"classes":[]},{"id":259,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2008\/07\/10\/the-last-post\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":1},"title":"The Last Post","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"Saturday morning Punk Rock Mommy died from inflammatory breast cancer. Her husband uploaded her last post and I read it and cried. I never met Punk Rock Mommy, I had never read her blog before this morning. But I am struck by the human spirit and how impending death can\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Cancer"","block_context":{"text":"Cancer","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/cancer-2\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"punk rock mommy","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/punk-rock-mommy.png?fit=800%2C800&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200,"srcset":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/punk-rock-mommy.png?fit=800%2C800&resize=350%2C200 1x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/punk-rock-mommy.png?fit=800%2C800&resize=525%2C300 1.5x, https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/07\/punk-rock-mommy.png?fit=800%2C800&resize=700%2C400 2x"},"classes":[]},{"id":287,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2008\/08\/04\/wanna-be-mommy\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":2},"title":"Wanna-Be-Mommy","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"I haven't talked in this blog much about my infertility issues. Sometimes I have to wait till I'm ready to open the door on a topic. We're starving college students with no money. We haven't really tried much beyond Clomid, Metformin and lots and lots of practice. On the other\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Health & Wellness"","block_context":{"text":"Health & Wellness","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/life-skills\/health-and-wellness\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":290,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2008\/08\/08\/what-i-didnt-know\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":3},"title":"What I Didn’t Know","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"I am humbled and wowed by your response to my Wanna-Be-Mommy post about infertility. We've been trying to conceive for four years and I was feeling hormonal and tired and cranky and quite frankly nearly giving up hope when I wrote that piece. Your response lifted my spirits. It is\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Health & Wellness"","block_context":{"text":"Health & Wellness","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/life-skills\/health-and-wellness\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"pregnant - CoffeeJitters.Net","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2008\/08\/Pregnant.jpg?fit=400%2C300&resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]},{"id":12,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2005\/07\/17\/on-being-an-auntie\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":4},"title":"On Being an Auntie…","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"We are now on day 3 of the great munchkin adventure. Max and Ilona arrived with Grandma on Friday night. Mr. H had been a little trepidatious about spending 5 days with my mom and 2 toddlers, but Ilona took care of that when she quickly made it clear to\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Daily Life"","block_context":{"text":"Daily Life","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/living-well\/daily-life-living-well\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"","src":"","width":0,"height":0},"classes":[]},{"id":226,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2008\/06\/06\/the-blueberry-incident\/","url_meta":{"origin":3023,"position":5},"title":"The Blueberry Incident","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"There is no talk of blueberries in my family - well, at least not without mentioning the blueberry incident. Eyes twinkle, hands rub together gleefully, posture adjusted to lean in a moment to hear the tale retold. Again. And Again. Its not much of a story, yet every time I\u2026","rel":"","context":"In "Family"","block_context":{"text":"Family","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/living-well\/family-living-well\/"},"img":{"alt_text":"021","src":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/farm4.static.flickr.com\/3261\/2555098696_880ffbd51f.jpg?resize=350%2C200","width":350,"height":200},"classes":[]}],"jetpack_likes_enabled":false,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3023","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=3023"}],"version-history":[{"count":2,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3023\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":5499,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/3023\/revisions\/5499"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=3023"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=3023"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=3023"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}