{"id":2497,"date":"2011-01-02T19:31:39","date_gmt":"2011-01-03T02:31:39","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/?p=2497"},"modified":"2021-03-17T19:14:41","modified_gmt":"2021-03-18T02:14:41","slug":"the-day-my-husband-threw-up-and-saved-our-relationship","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2011\/01\/02\/the-day-my-husband-threw-up-and-saved-our-relationship\/","title":{"rendered":"The Day My Husband Threw Up and Saved Our Relationship"},"content":{"rendered":"

I’ve been procrastinating on writing a blog post for a very long time now. \u00a0It’s Christmas. It’s the end of the year. \u00a0It’s the beginning of the new year. \u00a0So much pressure to write a deep, meaningful, soul searching, profound piece that sums up the meaning of life, and what I’ve learned this year. \u00a0Or at least pull together a humorous and\/or touching year in review post.<\/p>\n

This year I learned I have cancer. \u00a0I endured two surgeries, 6 months of chemo, and I’m currently on radiation. \u00a0I survived. \u00a0My family survived. \u00a0I haven’t completely messed up my daughter. yet.<\/p>\n

This year was too deep, and too long, for me to sum up in one pretty, little post. \u00a0Maybe one of these days, when I’ve put some distance between me and what I endured, I’ll be able to write something meaningful about this year, and my experience. \u00a0For now, I don’t want to think. \u00a0I don’t want to plumb the depths of my soul. \u00a0I don’t want to share what’s in my heart. \u00a0I haven’t processed it yet. \u00a0That will take some time.<\/p>\n

Besides all that, I’ve been sick. \u00a0I don’t mean cancer sick; \u00a0I mean coughing, sneezing, mucus like rubber cement, don’t you dare turn on the lights, throbbing sinuses, and it feels like a mile-long hike just getting to the bathroom sick. \u00a0I’m feeling much better, and starting to dig my way out of the haze now, but this has been lingering since before Christmas. \u00a0To all of you waiting on a return email, or phone call, I’m sorry. \u00a0I’ll get back to you soon. \u00a0If you’re waiting on a Christmas card… \u00a0ha ha ha. \u00a0giggle. snort. Yeah, right, it’s been years since I was organized enough to send those out – even when I was healthy.<\/p>\n

Don’t get me wrong. \u00a0I’m happy. \u00a0I’m afraid the first few paragraphs of this post may have led you to believe I’m bitter and pouting about this year. \u00a0Not so much. \u00a0I just don’t understand how I feel about it all yet. \u00a0I need more time to sort it out.<\/p>\n

Early last month, I started the Reverb10 project with such enthusiasm, but found myself avoiding my computer for the month of December, because I knew each new reverb prompt would lead to more thinking. \u00a0Shudder. \u00a0I still plan on continuing the Reverb10 project, but on my own timeline. \u00a0It may take me the remainder of 2011 to finish, and I may not make public all my responses, but I think it’s a wonderful way of reviewing where I’ve been, and making plans for the future.<\/p>\n

You still<\/em> want to know about the day my husband threw up and saved our relationship? <\/strong>Gross. Ok, just kidding, that would have piqued my interest as well. \u00a0Earlier today, my husband reminded me of this moment in the history of our relationship. \u00a0That memory is what brought me back to my computer to write, and thus, the reason the title of this post is dedicated to that moment.<\/p>\n

Long before we got married, and about 6 months after we met, I decided that falling in love with Aaron would be terribly inconvenient. \u00a0I wasn’t ready to be in love (this after years of “looking for love in all the wrong places”). I went around the house and gathered up the items of his that had accumulated (CDs, a hat, a shirt… \u00a0) and placed them next to the door, ready to send them and him on their way when he arrived at my place after work.<\/p>\n

When he showed up, he brushed past me, rushed to the bathroom, and spent what felt like forever in there puking. \u00a0Monstrous, earth shattering, roaring, I’ve never heard anyone puke like that. By the time he was done, cleaned up, and passed out in my bed, I had given up on thoughts of breaking off the relationship. I grabbed his possessions by the door and redistributed them back around the house. \u00a0It was too late. \u00a0I was already in love.<\/p>\n

Instead of fighting what is, I needed to accept it (good or bad), and then decide how I was going to respond to it.<\/p>\n

I got a little deep there, didn’t I?<\/p>\n

oops.<\/p>\n

\"My<\/a><\/p>\n

You can learn more about my cancer story here:<\/p>\n

\"my<\/a><\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Let’s Connect<\/strong><\/h2>\n

\"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span><\/a>\u00a0.\u00a0\"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span><\/a> . \"\"<\/span> . \"\"<\/span> . \"\"<\/span><\/a><\/span>
\n\"Follow<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

I’ve been procrastinating on writing a blog post for a very long time now. \u00a0It’s Christmas. It’s the end of the year. \u00a0It’s the beginning of the new year. \u00a0So much pressure to write a deep, meaningful, soul searching, profound piece that sums up the meaning of life, and what I’ve learned this year. \u00a0Or […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":6812,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_et_pb_use_builder":"","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","advanced_seo_description":"","jetpack_seo_html_title":"","jetpack_seo_noindex":false,"jetpack_post_was_ever_published":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_access":"","_jetpack_dont_email_post_to_subs":false,"_jetpack_newsletter_tier_id":0,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paywalled_content":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[695,1043,1042,138],"tags":[576,744,702,705,13,641],"class_list":["post-2497","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-cancer-2","category-health-and-wellness","category-living-with-cancer","category-parenting-living-well","tag-aaron-albert-haley","tag-introspection","tag-marriage-2","tag-relationships","tag-mr-h","tag-year-in-review","et-has-post-format-content","et_post_format-et-post-format-standard"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?fit=640%2C853","blog_post_layout_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=150%2C150",150,150,true],"full":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?fit=640%2C853",640,853,false]},"categories_names":{"695":{"name":"Cancer","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/cancer-2\/"},"1043":{"name":"Health & Wellness","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/life-skills\/health-and-wellness\/"},"1042":{"name":"Living with Cancer","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-with-cancer\/living-with-cancer\/"},"138":{"name":"Parenting & Family","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/category\/parenting-living-well\/"}},"tags_names":{"576":{"name":"Aaron Albert Haley","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/aaron-albert-haley\/"},"744":{"name":"introspection","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/introspection\/"},"702":{"name":"marriage","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/marriage-2\/"},"705":{"name":"relationships","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/relationships\/"},"13":{"name":"The Husband","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/mr-h\/"},"641":{"name":"year in review","link":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/tag\/year-in-review\/"}},"comments_number":0,"wpmagazine_modules_lite_featured_media_urls":{"thumbnail":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=150%2C150",150,150,true],"cvmm-medium":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=300%2C300",300,300,true],"cvmm-medium-plus":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=305%2C207",305,207,true],"cvmm-portrait":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=400%2C600",400,600,true],"cvmm-medium-square":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=600%2C600",600,600,true],"cvmm-large":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=640%2C853",640,853,true],"cvmm-small":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?resize=130%2C95",130,95,true],"full":["https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/01\/my-family.png?fit=640%2C853",640,853,false]},"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p1fDeG-Eh","jetpack-related-posts":[{"id":12681,"url":"http:\/\/coffeejitters.net\/blog\/2026\/03\/10\/16-year-cancerversary-and-finding-my-way-back-to-hope\/","url_meta":{"origin":2497,"position":0},"title":"16 Year Cancerversary, and finding my way back to hope","author":"Judy Schwartz Haley","date":"","format":false,"excerpt":"16 years ago, today, I got that call. 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