I didn’t mind the snowstorm much at all. It was a minor inconvenience, combined with a bevy of benefits. My husband at home for a few extra days. Family play time in the snow. A little girl’s first snowman. Soup with grilled sandwiches. Hot chocolate (Gem would be sure to verify that her’s [...]]]>

I didn’t mind the snowstorm much at all. It was a minor inconvenience, combined with a bevy of benefits. My husband at home for a few extra days. Family play time in the snow. A little girl’s first snowman. Soup with grilled sandwiches. Hot chocolate (Gem would be sure to verify that her’s was “warm”). Days packed with guilt-free snuggle time and togetherness.

Until my internet went out. Then it got personal.

Oddly, up until I noticed the outtage, I’d spent little time online. But in the hours, minutes, and seconds that have creeped by since that devastating discovery, I’ve thought of little else. We are all safe and well. We have electricity, heat, water, stockpiles of food, and an ever-deepening wonderland of snow and ice outside. It doesn’t matter.

I’m not connected.

I cannot share my every passing thought on facebook. I can’t pin pictures of food I will never cook, and clothes I will never wear. And since we dropped cable in favor of using the internet for tv, we might even have to break out the boxes of dvds that have been gathering dust in the closet. Even my phone is on Roam.

I’m quite certain I’ll weather this trauma just fine, and I’ll try not to spend my time counting the moments till I can post this message. In the meantime, I hope you are all safe and sound, warm and dry, that your problems are more frivolous than substantial, and that the storm leaves your homes and loved ones unscathed.

She offers up snowballs as precious gifts, then tosses them up in the air like so much confetti, squealing and laughing as the snow tickles her face.

And when she catches a snowflake on her glove, she blows it away, and [...]]]> It’s not her first snow, but perhaps the first she remembers.

She offers up snowballs as precious gifts, then tosses them up in the air like so much confetti, squealing and laughing as the snow tickles her face.

And when she catches a snowflake on her glove, she blows it away, and says “make a wish.”

I have no idea where she got that from.

She made her first snowman

And she set about playing as though it was her most important work

It is.

Even when seasoned with whimsy.

Sunday, she asked if Santa was going to come back, now that it snowed, so that he could have Christmas in the snow.

We learned that bears like to eat dandelions

My daughter discovered the most fascinating animal at the zoo

I spent a little [...]]]> I’m still learning to use my new camera, but I sure got a lot of practice with all our adventure this year. Here are some of my favorite photos.

We learned that bears like to eat dandelions

My daughter discovered the most fascinating animal at the zoo

I spent a little time in our back yard capturing ducks and lily pads

my daughter showed off her fashion sense

I trespassed in a beaver family’s back yard

I listed my 10 favorite places to be 

I got up close with some Poppies - I had no idea they were so hairy

I tried out the macro lens chasing down raindrops

My daughter and I explored Turnagain Pass in Alaska

I went tourist at Pike Place Market

I got all deep and philosophical about a Foggy Day

and I can’t finish this post without including another picture of the sweetest little girl in the world

You [...]]]> The weather turned since the last time I wrote one of these letters to you. In just a couple months we went from temperatures in the 80s to frosty mornings and piles of multicolored leaves on the ground. You’ve changed so much, grown up so much, in that little bit of time.

You notice the change in the trees. You notice the weather. You notice so many things that just a couple months ago would have slipped right past you. I have to be a little more careful now. And watch my tongue. Not that I am the kind of person who would thoughtlessly say things in your presence that I wouldn’t want you to repeat. ahem.

The past few months have been pretty busy. Especially October. I’ve taken to calling it Pinktober, because breast cancer awareness month takes over everything, no matter what else we’ve got going on.

As if I wasn’t already all too aware of breast cancer.

I have a feeling that this is going to be a part of a new pattern in our lives, that we will need to learn to just brace ourselves for Pinktober every year. We’ll learn to let the wave of pink wash over us without dredging up too much trauma, while embracing the opportunities that come in at the same time. We need to remember that Pinktober is a time of reunion with those who have become close friends in this breast cancer battle, it’s also a time to celebrate life, and raise some money to help all those who will be diagnosed in the year ahead.

When I see myself in your mannerisms, the things you say, the way you turn a phrase, it reminds me that one of my most important tasks as your mother is to be a role model. And that responsibility has become a critical part of my decision making process.

Some people pay lipservice to the old WWJD: What Would Jesus Do? I take a different approach. When faced with a difficult decision, I ask WWIWGTD: What Would I Want Gem To Do? But I’m asking that question for real. I consider this question in all different aspects of my life from brushing my teeth even if I’m staying in bed all day, to how I interact with friends and strangers, to how I research and take a position on an issue, to how I react when people are cruel to me.

I don’t want to give the impression that I’m letting you make my decisions.  I need to make choices that are healthy for me, and I want you to learn to make decisions that are healthy for you.

The net result of all this is that I am living my life more mindfully because of you. I’m making more thoughtful decisions. I’m taking better care of my body. I now respond differently when people try to walk all over me, and while some may not like that change, I know it’s a change that needed to be made.

You inspire me to be a better person.

Thank you

I love you so much

Mommy

Add some bedazzled furnishings

A little finery, and a little wine

And a few cameras?

Well, for starters, you end up with some fun pictures…

. 

But more importantly, this event raised money for some pretty awesome organizations.

Friday night we celebrated and raised money for the Young Survival Coalition with our annual [...]]]> It sounds cliche to say that women who have faced down a life-threatening diagnosis really know how to embrace life. It is cliche. It’s not even always true. But my girls? My friends? They know how to party.

Friday night we celebrated and raised money for the Young Survival Coalition with our annual silent auction and dance party, In Living Pink.

The silent auction was wildly successful, and boasted donated items such as massage certificates, white water rafting, sight seeing cruises and flights, art, event tickets, A NYC package including Letterman tickets, Seahawks gear – autographed by players, jewelry, restaurants, vacation packages, and too much more to list.

So what does all this money we’re raising go to? Here’s a few examples:

• $25 pays for a resource kit for young women newly diagnosed with breast cancer. This resource kit includes an organizer for tracking the onslaught of information that must be managed through treatment, an encouraging and helpful DVD “you are not alone,” a guide to services available to young women with cancer, and a chemo-hat – hand-knit by the mother of one of our members.
• $50 pays for flowers for one of our girls in the hospital, or going through a rough patch
• $125 pays for facility rental so we can bring in educational guest speakers on a wide variety of issues such as nutrition, dealing with the effects of treatment on sexuality, and post-treatment breast reconstruction.
• $200 pays for the facility rental and therapist facilitator for twice monthly group therapy sessions.
• $300 will send one of our members to our annual retreat at Harmony Hill

The guys, too…

Hey, look, it’s me. (One of the best parts of having a 2 year old little girl: Gem declared me to be a “mermaid princess” before I left the house #mamaswoon)

Thank you to everyone who contributed so much to this event, from the planning committee to the volunteers who put in so many hours the night of the party.

The decorations looked amazing, Brooke from Movin’ 92.5 kept the party hoppin’, and Miss Shelrawka rocked the house.

Thank you so much. I puffy heart love all of you.

.

This is the story of how I became an on air radio personality.

Ok, it’s not. I’m not.

It’s not even about me.

This is a story about Debbie Cantwell, and the non-profit organization she started on her kitchen table, all by herself, to help young women with breast cancer, like me.